The Insignificance and Vulnerability of Simplicity

Friday, August 12

Another mundane and routined day @ work..mood's attempting to climb up the soapy slide..is it ever possible? Nope, I keep falling..falling into the abyss of bitterness..even tried to use the pile of "forever urgent" issues that were outstanding to bury my "moodiness"..if there is such a word..and I seem to take a lot of bittergourd today..keep having to consistently rid those unkind thoughts in my mind..and replace them with empathy..

I did sense she may be unhappy with me for not finishing up the receipts..or somewhat otherwise..comm people may misunderstand me..(that explained the weird glances I got from them) but I was told to prioritise my work in that manner..she did not knew it..the initial intention was to coerce her to do it herself..end up I just got that "Oh my gosh" feeling..check out slow.com.sg/jookoon..I did those she took 2 days to complete within an hour..thinking why not..since I can finish it and get it over and done with..tsk tsk..I'm ranting..

Yea..I knew she got a lot of project work to do..stressed up over school..project mates..and not much time to accompany her kids anymore..it's tough being a working mother..I did respect her for that..but if you want to do it, do it with pride and determination and stop complaining to others about having a hard life..whatz up with calling the school coordinator and complained to them that the course is very tough, that they should not have so much projects and assignments..have some considerations to mothers..no time to look after their kids..blah blah blah..if that's the case, simple as that..dont take up the course..easy way out -___-'''...and then shut up..

Getting used to things
As I get more accustomed to the job..I start to see a lot of the ugly sides..perhaps dear accelaerated the process of isomorphism..of evolution..of maturity..in me..till sometimes..I feel very de-motivated..it's always a dilemma..I do want him to share with me his unhappiness at work..but at the same time..I knew more about things I shouldnt have..hence affecting my attitude towards people whom I've lost my patience to..sometimes ignorance is bliss..yet if someone close is not not sharing his dissatisfaction with you..you wont feel blissful anymore..(*_*) The insecurity surges forth..

Growing up
A part of life..many will say you can choose whether you want it to be beautiful or distorted..but nah..crappy..how life turns out to be..we have no control over..many a times..we find ourselves in a situation..stuck..in a moment where we have to get out of..loads of decisions to be made..with every decision made comes with heavy responsibilities..note the plural..the transition from innocence to experience is tough..harsh..mould us into something which we are not..As adults, we will try to improve it..and then as always, it brings along sheer disappointment..where it comes to the point where conformance is the best way out..if you cant change them..be part of them..

irony @

2:58 PM